Word Hurt Too - Part 1
So this week I wanted to talk about my favorite unit in the 40k universe, the Noise Marines. Now anyone who knows me will tell you that I’m completely dedicated to Slaanesh, so it makes sense why I love them so. If any of you have read the book “Fulgrim” you’ll know what I mean. I just love everything about them, their fluff, their color scheme, the weapons, the god like drug habits, etc. so when this toilet paper worthy codex came out those oh so many years ago I knew I had to use them; and I must say, they perform outstanding.
Now I know what most of you will say and think. I understand the current meta, and I know how many others play CSM. But I do things my own way, and I’ll be damned if I don’t have a unit in any army I field. (though I’m serious about the damned part, I think Slaanesh is watching me) So lets see…where to start…
Well the first point many use against me is that they aren’t the best troop unit we CSM generals have at our disposal. Okay, true. Noise Marines have some stiff competition in the troop slot. There’s Plague Marines and Khorne Bezerkers, hell even regular Chaos Space Marine squads can have more optimal load outs. But hear me out. Let us start with the points.
Noise Marines are only 20 points a model, more than CSM but less that other cult troops. Just like other cult troops they’re fearless, and they get the Mark of Slaanesh whish boosts their initiative to 5. So that’s 5 points more that CSM for fearless and I5, I’ll take it. The I5 makes sure that they are perfect for assault, both giving and taking (yes that’s supposed to be an innuendo). With it they will most likely be striking before everyone else, and having 2 CCW as well as any power weapon option attacks means you’ll be able to soften the blow coming back your way.
“Dan, WTF?! Zerkers are I5 on the charge and have more attacks!! And Plague Marines have a higher toughness with FNP and defensive grenades!!!” Yeah, I know, thank you for stating the obvious. I understand that KB are monsters in CC and that PM are amazing at soaking up pretty much everything. But Noise Marines shine in other ways. No they can’t take Melta Guns, but you know what they can take? Wait…wait for it…Sonic Weapons!!!
I love sonic weaponry!! And the codex allows you to kit out your squads in lots of different ways. First there’s the good old reliable Sonic Blaster. For five points you get an Assault 2 or Heavy 3. Notice the or? I understand that it’s an extra five points, but the versatility it provides is unparalleled for anti-infantry guns. This now allows you always fire up to 2’ whether you move or not. Now we shall break for some mathhammer…
So, lets look at a regular marine shooting a bolter at another marine. That means you need a 3+ to hit, a 4+ to wound, and then get through a 3+ armor save. It gives you a 8.84% chance to wound per shot. With a full Tactical squad, lets say with only bolters, firing at full range you’re scoring about .8 wounds.
So now, with sonic blasters, you’re getting twice that…1.6 wounds. And that’s at 2’, not 1’. And if you don’t move obviously you’ll get 3 shots, and that’s 2.4. We all know that the more dice you roll the better, or closer to average, and that’s what Sonic Blasters gives you.
Another option Noise Marines can take is the Blastmaster. This gun also has 2 profiles that you can fire it as. Either a 36” S5 AP4 Assault 2, Pinning or a 48” S8 AP3 Heavy 1, Blast, Pinning. Obviously you’re gonna wanna remain stationary with this bad boy. The gun speaks (literally) for itself. I have to admit that I don’t really have that much experience with using them because, well, they cost 40 pts and you can only take up to one per unit. Is it good? Yeah, it can be. Is it worth it? No, not really.
Now the last in the armory, and my personal favorite, the Doom Siren. For those who don’t know it’s a S5 AP3 template weapon. That’s right, a AP3 template!! Is there really any downside to it? Well, it’s only available for the Noise Champion. That means that you need to spent 35 pts just to access the gun, which is another 15 pts. It’s completely worth the 15 pts, but it does make your Champion 50 pts, and that’s before any power weapon options. The pay off is amazing. This single gun takes the unit from being above average to down right hellish.
So lets recap quick. Noise marines are cult troops which means that they’re Fearless. They also come with the Mark of Slaanesh which gives them +1I, so a 5 instead of a 4. We covered their armory which basicly goes like this – Sonic Blasters, yes; Blastmaster, no; and Doom Siren, hell yes! That’s it for this week. I’ll be doing a second part later this week going over some basic tactics that focus on Noise Marines and their synergy with the rest of the CSM codex.
Till then, billie_joe out, oh and Death to the False Emperor.